They’re kids. They’re toys. Stop obsessing; let ’em play

Meant to post this a couple of days ago. Lenore Skenazy had a good piece in The Wall Street Journal in Tuesday’s paper, striking another shrewd blow in her epic battle to beat some sense into the parents of America. This one was headlined, “Parents Are Taking the Fun Out of Toys,” and here’s an excerpt:

Remember when a ball was just a ball? Now it is a tactile stimulating sensory aid that helps develop gross motor skills.

Really. Strolling through the international Toy Fair at the Javits Center in New York City last week was like walking through the brightly painted halls of a children’s hospital—at once cheery and sad. Cheery were the shiny bikes and busy ant farms. Sad was the way the marketers made it sound like they were peddling early intervention in a box.

Take “Baby’s First Construction Marble Raceway Set” from Rollipop—a very cute plastic set of chutes and curves that any marble would be delighted to loop through. It looked ready to delight any kid, too, and better still keep him occupied while Mommy checks her BlackBerry. But according to the box copy, this was no mere diversion. It was an educational show-stopper that “encourages hand-eye coordination,” even while “visually stimulating” the brain and developing “fine motor skills.”…

And so forth. I know exactly whereof she speaks.

The Twins adore the Wonder Pets (and their younger cousin is getting into the show, too), and I save episodes on the DVR for when they’re at our house, and sit and watch with them. This little prologue always gets me:

Wonder Pets encourages preschoolers to make music to express themselves, to explore the diversity of the world around them, and to share and care by supporting social and emotional development.

Are you kidding me? I’m trying to imagine Captain Kangaroo feeling the need to spell out a self-justification like that before an episode of Tom Terrific. No way! (Mr. Green Jeans wouldn’t stand for it, I’m sure.) I mean, set aside the painfully PC therapeutic-jargon lingo (“make music to express themselves,” “explore the diversity of the world,” “share and care,” “social and emotional development”), why is ANY sort of mission statement or whatever necessary before a bit of light diversion for toddlers? Do they feel obliged to go that far to expiate the parents’ guilt (guilt that’s exacerbated, or should be, by the fact that apparently the parents don’t sit with their kids and find out for THEMSELVES what the show is like)?

Are young parents today really that demanding, or insecure, or fretful, or, I don’t know, anal-retentive? Maybe so, but I hate to think it.

This stuff just floors me…

Come on, people! They’re little kids. Just let them play, or enjoy a moment’s entertainment when they take a break from play. Not every moment needs to be like an admissions interview for Harvard. Sheesh…

12 thoughts on “They’re kids. They’re toys. Stop obsessing; let ’em play

  1. bud

    On the one hand I agree with you that a child’s life has become much too structured and that toys are marketed in a manner suggesting they are a development tool rather than as a mere device to have fun.

    But given the recent discussion about our young adults inability to verbally communicate maybe a bit of attention to development skills would be a good thing. After all the young adults of today had to learn the habit of saying “like” every third word from somewhere.

    So let’s split the difference. Allow kids the time to have fun but make sure they are provided a fair amount of structural development training as well. It’s like, ya know, an amazing thing watching kids grow up. But it’s also good to do it right.

  2. Debra

    I am going to have to dig up a few blog links to articles telling you how to create “sensory” tubs to encourage learning. Basically, you dump stuff in a box and let kids mess around with it. They’re “great interactive tool when children are given a choice regarding participation.” They can be “intimidating” to create, but, hey, if you can pull off the “clean dirt” one your kids won’t get “filthy.”

    I must be weird. I turn the kids loose in the back yard and don’t especially care if they get “filthy.”

  3. Brad

    Ha! I just fixed it. HAHAHA!

    I wrote it in Word, and TRICKED Word into letting me do it (the smarter the program, the easier to trick it, apparently), and copied it over, and that WORKED.

    Solving the problem is so much more satisfying than griping…

  4. Brad

    By the way, not to sound over-obsessive myself: I want to apologize for the backward apostrophe in that headline. I’ve done everything I can think of to fix it, but the WordPress headline box won’t let me.

    I hate, hate, HATE the way word-processors refuse to let anyone put an actual apostrophe at the front of a word (actually, you usually can, but you have to trick the software), or a number (all those billboards and such about the ’08 election were a constant irritant). I mean, what’s the logic there? It seems to me that one is MORE likely to want to use an apostrophe in that manner than to use a single open quote — so WHY make the latter a default?

    For that matter, why constantly assume so much for the writer? Such as leaping to define more characters than I’m trying to define in a text? Word is horrible about that.

    And… well, I could go on, but I won’t. I could get into programs that want to “help” me print a picture or email it to someone, when all I’m trying to do is save the stupid file, and I know how to do that, and I know how to do a simple thing like go and get it later if I want to edit it, or post in online, or email it, or (very seldom) PRINT the blasted thing?

    Yeah, I know … Watson won on Jeopardy. But computers need to stop trying to think for us, because so often, they just screw things up.

    OK. I’m calmer now…

  5. Karen McLeod

    Is there anyone out there in favor of letting the kids develop their own toys and games (out of materials available)? It gives ’em a chance to use their imagination, and to figure out what works (and what doesn’t).

  6. Kathy

    When parents actually talk with their children, not to mention playing with them and reading to them, it’s absolutely amazing what children pick up. It’s like, you know, if you do your homework and read good books, you’ll make a high SAT score without taking SAT prep classes—that is if you’re smart.

  7. Maude Lebowski

    “Are young parents today really that demanding, or insecure, or fretful, or, I don’t know, anal-retentive?”

    Yes. I’ve had to actively seek out laissez-faire parents like myself who let their kids climb trees and get dirty and play without constant adult supervision.

    http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/7148143/

  8. Scout

    But the thing is plain old play is developmentally beneficial, whether you describe it with fancy words or not – but it helps to have those fancy ways of saying that plain old play is educational, when for example you are writing lesson plans for 4 year olds to satisfy the politically correct educational gestapo. That’s how I see it.

    And ditto to what Kathy said.

  9. Nick Nielsen

    You may be right, Kathryn. We never had one, though. We had to make do with new-mown hay and bean poles.

  10. Kathryn Fenner (D- SC)

    We didn’t have hay, but we did make “forts” out of pine straw–we’d rake it into elaborate floor plans for our mansions, too. I think my parents played us on that one, though.

Comments are closed.