Cute to the nth degree: Lumosity’s ‘It girl,’ Emily Greco

Silence complains that I had no new posts yesterday:

Brad, do you have plans to ever do a new post again, or should we just continue to battle amongst ourselves in last month’s comment threads?

He makes it sound like forever. It was just one day — and I was responding to comments. Gee, I figured that y’all were having enough fun with that rambling 153-comment thread on last Thursday’s Virtual Front Page.

I responded that “I get into these days sometimes when the only thing I can think of to post about is either a) Too trivial to post about without it being folded in among some more serious items, or b) Way too heavy and involved to embark upon on a busy day.

I had both kinds on my mind yesterday, and didn’t get to either. Here’s the one from category A…

I’m thinking about starting a new category of posts, called something like “What I Googled today,” or “Google of the day,” or just “Googling.”

Here’s the first entry.

Yesterday, after I found myself once again deliberately ALT-TABbing to and watching the Lumosity ad stuck between songs on Pandora (instead of hitting the “mute” button as I do on some of them, because they’re pretty jarring, especially when they occur on my Erik Satie station, as opposed to my Weezer station), I wondered who that unbelievably cute girl is — the one who makes me want to see the ad. I was pretty sure I was not the only one who had searched to find out, and I was right.

First, let’s pause to consider terminology. Some people misunderstand the word, “cute.” (Some also misunderstand the word “girl” when applied to someone of child-bearing age, but those people aren’t as old as I am, and/or don’t have children who are most likely older than this girl.) “Cute” does not mean pretty (although it often overlaps), much less beautiful, sexy or hot. It refers to a form of appeal, but it is not (necessarily) sexual, or related to pulchritude.

To explain: Zooey Deschanel is cute. She’s also pretty, but that’s a slightly separate thing. Ingrid Bergman was beautiful, which is not exactly the same thing as pretty. Carrie-Anne Moss is hot, especially in “The Matrix” — the first one, in which she wore the leather catsuit, which reminds us that Diana Rigg was hot in “The Avengers,” and this is not a leather thing. Speaking of cat suits, as in Catwoman, Sean Young was in her heyday sexy, hot and beautiful. Just kinda batty.

Anyway, the young woman in the Lumosity ad is unbelievably cute. This does not mean I want to have an illicit relationship with her. It just means that I look forward to seeing the ad. I am not alone, either in this, or in thinking the right word for her is “cute.” Here are some YouTube comments about her:

  • “For some reason,I think that this woman is really cute. And I’m a female.”
  • “Shes so f___ing cute”
  • “Emily Greco is so cute! She’s so cute I get happy just knowing the Luminosity commercial is starting. Whatever Luminosity paid her – it’s not enough now that hearing Luminosity puts me in a happy mood because I connect it with the cute woman in the commercial. I’m sure she has the same affect on most viewers.”

Those are sandwiched among some grossly negative comments, from the kinds of people who live to make negative comments. We all know the sort.

Anyway, as you see, her name is Emily Greco, and no, she’s not just some super-cute person who happened to be a Lumosity customer. She’s an actress. That naturalness is art. Here’s her agency’s page about “Our Rising Star — Emily Greco.”

What is it that defines her appeal? What is the “it” here? Well, it involves the fourth dimension, because it doesn’t come across in a still photo (although this isn’t bad). You need the video. You need to see the thing she does at the end (25 seconds) when she bats her eyes and smiles that crooked smile (proof that she’s not beautiful, since technically “beauty” is a function of symmetry, or so I’ve been told). All in one split second. And if you’ve seen the ad before, waiting to see her do that again is what keeps you watching the ad through the boring 10-second sales-pitch part, with the graphics.

Anyway, I haven’t seen an individual in an ad with that much appeal in years and years. So I take a professional interest in this. I also want to see the ad again…

21 thoughts on “Cute to the nth degree: Lumosity’s ‘It girl,’ Emily Greco

  1. Brad Warthen Post author

    I’m not sure what that means, but I think y’all treat my posts as “open threads.” I never know where the conversation’s going to go…

    1. Kathryn Fenner

      You just say “Open thread” and we talk about whatever we want.
      I can’t sort out the tangle that is Thursday’s VFP any more.

  2. Mark Stewart

    I don’t get it. She looks like she once had really bad eyesight before it was corrected. There is a certain look to that which persists in people. On at least I perceive that some people once had poor vision. So I may be the odder one.

  3. Doug Ross

    Now THIS is the type of blog post that will drive traffic to the site…

    I think “cuteness” is in the eyes and smile which I get from the ad above. She’s cute when she smiles and her eyes light up. “Beauty” is in the cheekbones and lips. More structural… Some beautiful women have kind of dead eyes – Angelina Jolie comes to mind there. Hot is a beauty + attitude.

    Cute: Meg Ryan (pre-plastic surgery)
    Beautiful: Catherine Zeta-Jones
    Hot: Stacey Kiebler

  4. Silence

    I don’t particularly find the “Lumosity” girl attractive at all, and in the photo of her with a nostril piercing she’s particularly unattractive – I don’t abide nose rings except on bulls and camels. I give her about a 4/10. She’s roughly the equivalent of Progressive Insurance’s “Flo”.

    She’s not even worth doing a “Rule 34” check on.

  5. Brad Warthen Post author

    Some of y’all don’t know what “cute” is.

    I think Doug gets it. Although there are a lot of people I would have picked for “hot” before Stacey Kiebler (whom I had to look up).

    Starting, of course, with Christina Hendricks, who famously said to Captain Mal on “Firefly,” “But face it, hubby, I’m really hot.” I’ve seldom seen a line delivered more convincingly…

    1. Silence

      I prefer my redheads to be, you know, actual redheads. Although Ms. Hendricks’ assets are more than ample, I understand that she is not a natural carrot top.

    2. Doug Ross

      Stacey’s good enough for my doppelganger, George Clooney (he was Dr. Doug Ross on E.R.). I believe he has an ample pool to select from.

      Kellie Pickler raised herself several notches on Dances With The Stars. She went from quirky, cute to hubba hubba over the past few years.

  6. Matt Nightingale

    I love that you think my friend Emily is so cute. I totally agree… She’s also an outstanding human being and actor, and she could totally use your help – as in NOW. She was chosen as a finalist for the lead role in an upcoming movie. It would be an amazing boost to her already-blossoming career. Unfortunately, it’s one of those somewhat irritating social media-fueled contests where she has to rely on votes instead of the fact that she’s clearly best for the role. Please consider clicking here: http://www.nellieblystarsearch.com and selecting her. You can only vote once from each browser. Please also consider posting to Facebook, other blogs, Twitter, etc. Thank you so much.

    1. Anthony Rocchio

      I have seen her audition for The role of Nellie Bly. I believe that she would be perfect for the part.

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