I’ve mentioned before how much I enjoy, in building my family tree, finding ancestors with fun nicknames, such as “Strongbow,” and “Horse-Swapping Billy Smith” and “Shaggy-Breeches.”
The very best sobriquets are the medieval ones — just the best, terrific, believe me. They’re just so… direct. For instance, I am descended from the following: Charles the Fat, Charles the Bald, Charles the Hammer, Charles the Beloved and Charles the Wise. And that’s just the Charleses. (All are direct ancestors except the Fat, who is just a cousin, but I couldn’t leave him out.)
Take that current obsession and combine it with my enjoyment of such TV shows as “Vikings” and “The Last Kingdom,” and you just know that I would love this Twitter parody, “Donaeld the Unready“:
As you can see, Donaeld is “The best early medieval King out there. I’m just great. I’m the bretwalda. The bestwalda. I’ve got great swords, everyone says so. Make Mercia Great Again.”
Some of his recent Tweets:
Canute. What a loser. Can’t even hold back the sea. It’s just water. We’re going to be so tough on the sea. Canute was too soft. Sad.
— Donaeld The Unready (@donaeldunready) February 4, 2017
Some people say we should get the Frisians in to help DRAIN THE FENS. NO WAY. Frisians part of the problem. Think, people. Trust me.
— Donaeld The Unready (@donaeldunready) February 7, 2017
The threat from radical Vikings is real! I’ve banned all longships until we can find out what is going on! No dragonheads here! #mmga
— Donaeld The Unready (@donaeldunready) February 7, 2017
Many people know I can’t be bought. Why? Simple. It’s my hoard guys. Gold, silver, arm rings, all the swords. Seriously guys, it’s great
— Donaeld The Unready (@donaeldunready) February 6, 2017
Don’t read the Anglo-Saxon Chronicle. It’s a rag. No wonder it’s struggling. We are just having a few technical issues with our torches
— Donaeld The Unready (@donaeldunready) February 6, 2017
Mainstream Bards won’t shut up about Danish hacking. Sure they hack, they’ve got axes. But we should focus on the future. Gonna be great.
— Donaeld The Unready (@donaeldunready) February 6, 2017
Enjoy.
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Come on, now, y’all — this was FUN!
If it didn’t make fun of Trump, I’ll bet Claus would like it — you’re a fan of “Vikings,” too, right?
I’ve got to get back to it. Still in the middle of the second season. I’m making myself wait until I start working out again to watch it — the episodes are a good length for a workout…
The Canute one (the first one) was funny. I can hear that in Trump’s voice.
And some of them aren’t at all silly. Banning the longships is a pretty good goal — from an English perspective.
But unlikely to be effective.
My ancestor King Ælla of Northumbria would probably have been all for it.
My ancestor Ragnar would have laughed at it…
Of course, if the Vikings had just been entering the country to pick the Englishmen’s crops and build their houses and work in their chicken-processing plants for low wages, I doubt they’d have had nearly as big a problem with it.
But maybe they would have. People are funny…